New to PCOS

Some of the biggest issues I have had with PCOS so far is weight gain and anxiety. Weight gain is frustrating alone! I have gained 50 lbs in the last two years, and 40 of them have been in the last year. I was so frustrated with myself because I thought I was eating too much, being lazy, too stressed, etc. I am sure to an extent it was true, but I had no idea why it seemed like my weight was ballooning when my diet had not really changed much from previous years.

My anxiety is not just that I'm afraid of what this disorder is doing to my body, but also just anxiety in general. I have a lot of it! I am honestly not even sure how to explain my anxiety, its like an attack that happens whenever it feels like it. I think anxiety is a fairly normal emotion that we feel in life, and I wouldn't say I have severe anxiety but sometimes it does get the best of me.

Oh, and one more. I have felt so exhaustively tired! I literally have to peel myself out of bed in the mornings, and I often end up taking one to two hour naps during the day. It is so hard to want to get things done and have no energy to do it. I felt like I was nuts, and sometimes I still do. Today I feel good though, so I am going to take advantage of that! (I'm not sure if it is because fall is here and I love October or if the supplements are kicking in to improve my mood and energy, but I'll take it!)

Oh just kidding, one more: Irregular menstrual cycles. Sometimes I am not sure if I am grateful for the lack of them or worried. I honestly leaned more towards grateful, haha! But it was frustrating because I kept wondering if I was possibly pregnant or if one of my ovaries had shut down, or if I had some kind of cancer or serious problem. After missing 5 months of menstrual cycles, i decided it might be more of an issue than I thought. It also made me wonder if I was even ovulating, which having done some reseach it seems I probably am not.

Now that I have gone on complaining about my symptoms, it is time for me to figure out a plan. It is what it is, ya know? So What am I going to do about it? Because I don't want to feel like this my whole life. Maybe I will, maybe that is the trial I will have in this life. But I don't want to feel this way knowing I did nothing to try to solve it.

Having been recently diagnosed, I don't feel like I have a lot of experience with medication and diet yet. What is hard for me right now is trying to figure out what my symptoms are and if PCOS is why I am having them. I have noticed that medically, we tend to treat each symptom as if it is it's own problem. But I am beginning to wonder if all of the symptoms and struggles I have been having all go together with one culprit at the head: my health. Not just physical fitness and nutrition, but also my mental and emotional health, my social health, my spiritual health, etc. I am noticing that just like my hormones are out of balance, my life seems out of balance also. I don't think that my faith will cure me alone, I don't think friendship and support will cure me alone, I don't think medication will cure me alone, and I don't think a change in diet will cure me alone. Granted, I have a lot of sorting to do in my life to make sure I balance it all, and I may find it doesn't have as big of a difference as I think it does now but I am willing to try.

So that is where I am right now in this journey. There are many different roads I can take, and I am working on figuring out which one. I wish I could take all of them at once if it was possible, but I'd probably end up worse off than I am! Right now I am willing to try birth control (Tri-Sprintec is the one I will be taking), but I do not want to have to take it for the rest of my life. I mentioned in my about me section that my plan is to lose weight and change my lifestyle by being more active, finding new activities I enjoy, and eating better. I am hoping the birth control will help in that process, along with some supplements I am trying (D-chiro-inositol and Vitex--which I just read may partially reverse what birth control is doing... so we'll see).